Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Adventures in NYC

On top of Sam's rooftop

Inspiring images and words @ the Ransom art show

Friends, kiddos, and loved ones gathering together


Supported our lovely and talented friend Adrienne

Discovered a warm cat sleeping on my belly

Wandering through the East Village, sipping German beers, & sharing funny stories

Getting a new pencil pouch in at the market in Bryant Park

Waking up at 4am on a Friday & packing my essential items in a bright red suitcase.
Choosing to be a jetsetter can be tough.Thankful that my travel buddy
Albert offered to drive. Unable to sleep on our early morning flight. Kinda jealous that Albert
was able to pass out and snore. Inspired to get more rest.


We land in EWR and take a slow train from Jersey into Penn Station.
Did I mention that the train was slow? Albert telling me to relax because we're on
vacation, and all I can do is memorize the fact that the Q & R train is a yellow line
to Chinatown. Albert accuses me of being racist. I roll my eyes & shake my head.

We begin walking through Herald Square. We see that Macy's has a giant lighted sign that says, "Believe."
I learn that Albert does not like to walk. That may not be a good sign if we are vacationing in NYC. We find our way to Chinatown. There was a distinct
grittiness, and little Asian ladies ask me if I want to buy a fake luxury bag.


Officer Sam asks if anyone offered to sell me a bag. I nod yes. When Albert and I walk with
Officer Sam back on the sidewalk, nobody wants to talk to us anymore about fake handbags. That was entertaining. Seems like Officer Sam has a lot of friends in Chinatown.


Dim sum. Waitress tries to nonchalantly put multiple plates of dumplings on our table, and I smile and tell I only wanted one.
Ladies pushing carts and carts of dim sum. Eating with chopsticks and listening to more fascinating cop stories. Albert and I are excited to tour the precinct. We can't go in the holding cell because someone was arrested.

End up in Times Square. The tourists freak out when Snoop and his bodyguard walk down the sidewalk. Lots of cameras and people stopping.
I smile at Snoop and try to walk around the crowd,
and Snoop's bodyguard gives me a shove and a pat on the butt. Ick. And, Albert laughs at me. Double ick.
I roll my eyes & shake my head. Then halfway smile because I assume that's my official welcome to The City.


End up having our after party at Adrienne's swanky hotel. Kiddos laughing. Albert
passing out. Tomfoolery ensues. Sam takes us on the L Train or should I say
the Hipster Express back to Brooklyn.


Slept in on a Saturday for the first time in weeks. It felt good to work on my sketchbook
and listen to some Johnny Cash. More relaxing and more resting. I take a chance and check out
a class at Makara Studio. Met an amazing yoga teacher with an incredible understanding
of anatomy & physiology. Since I'm a teacher in training, she invited me to
provide assists to her class with straps. Yoga teacher's language is a little more fiery and blunt than what I'm used to hearing down South.
Inspired by NYC style yoga. And, I was having all the fun.


Saturday afternoon consisted of eating a bagel and making Albert come with me
while I get a massage. I needed Albert to be my Chinese interpreter/bodyguard.
Massage was ah-may-zing!  Little Asian ladies are deceptively strong.


Joined Adrienne and her kiddos at the Ransom artshow. I could not remember the last time
I really examined and appreciated art. With happy art fans, I quieted my mind and
took it all in. Enjoyed a warm and cozy curry afterwards.


We embraced our inner hipsters and walked into a place
with lots of people and PBRs. The bar had miniature golf in the
back. A crazy Eastern European wanted to play and interrupt my game. Whatevs. I'm on vacation and I don't care.


Sunday rolled around and I slept in a bit. Walked over to yoga class again.
I began to start missing the heated vinyasa flow style at my home studio
in Texas. Spent the rest of the day wandering around Sam's old haunts, listening, walking, and
exploring. I tried to find Holden Caulfield.



Renewed. Refreshed. And restored.
Open to going on the next adventure... Ecuador here I come.










Thursday, November 7, 2013

How do you reclaim a dream deferred?


A Dream Deferred
by Langston Hughes

What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?

-------

That Langston Hughes poem can hang so heavy on my heart sometimes. And, I'm sure there are so many people out there with a lifetime full of dreams deferred...

perhaps it's a novel that lives in your head, but has never even existed in a rough draft,
a vivid painting that only exists in your imagination,
the trip you keep meaning to take and yet never take the time to plan

or perhaps even worse...

the lack of even having big and bold dreams...
the lack of an imagination to even know what your heart wants...

Oftentimes these dreams or unfulfilled stirrings and lofty desires sit there on our souls. These dreams...these "someday I'll do's" just keep buzzing away in my ear like a pestering mosquito when I'm trying to sleep in the middle of the night.

Life is best experienced when you are a dreamer who can take action -- not waiting for perfection -- but being ready now to get messy, uncomfortable, and have the courage to be transformed.

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

A story about crayons (because you deserve love, possibility, and fun)

Flickr: irish [hunny b]

In the past, I viewed so many aspects of my life like God handed me a stubby black crayon that I found on the ground. I was able to get by with this little black crayon. I could draw basic things - just getting by seeing things in black. I could stay within the lines that other people defined for me and yet never listening to the truth that was already inside of me.

What was this truth? There's always been this little voice inside of me that would wake me up in the middle of the night that wanted me to believe there was more to my life than just this little black crayon. I held tightly to my little black crayon because I didn't believe I deserved anything more than that.

Then slowly I began to meet people in my life who had lots of crayons. They dreamed in big ways and loved in big ways and because they loved so much they were able to share their crayons with me. They had the big box of crayons with the legit sharpener. At first, I would look at my little black crayon and wonder why my life didn't have room for a big box of crayons, too.

The heartbreaking truth for me was at the time, I didn't believe I deserved a big box of crayons.  I believed this because I let the dark and sad parts of my life dictate my vision. I wanted those crayons and yet I let unhappy people around me tell me that I didn't deserve it. The only color I could see was fear.

Many many years ago, a colleague tore up a design that I had been working on. Not only was it torn up in front of other colleagues, this person told me that all my designs in the presentation were worthless. People feared this person so much that not one colleague stood up to this bully. I didn't even stand up for myself.  I was so unhappy that I interpreted this experience as the bully saying to me, "Not only is your presentation worthless, by the way, you are worthless." I let an unhappy person make me believe that I had to be unhappy, too. 

How does a beautiful, smart, healthy and successful woman end up believing she is worthless? When the only color she can see is fear.


Through the support of good people who care and love me, I choose to never look at my life with such a low sense of self worth. I am loved and I am precious. And, hell yeah... I deserve the big box of crayons with the legit sharpener. 

I surround myself with people who have cases and cases of crayons. I have access to my own box of crayons because I have grown to have a better relationship with myself and with God and with how I view life. God would never hand me a stubby little black crayon.

If God is limitless grace, then as a child of God, I am limitless and I have grace.

I hope that you have access to a limitless amount of crayons because you deserve love, possibility, and fun.



Monday, October 21, 2013

A story about joy, happiness (and public urination)

The beach near my father's childhood home
UPDATE (11/13/13): Over the weekend, Typhoon Haiyan made landfall to central Philippines. http://bbc.in/17cgEOm

I want to personally thank everyone who has reached out to me about my family in the Philippines. I am thankful and blessed to report that they are safe because my family lives on the northern island of Luzon (where Manila is located).

As a UNICEF supporter AND a very blessed person, I ask you to consider joining me in donating funds to UNICEF's emergency response efforts. http://bit.ly/1cneY7A

And, if you haven't read my story about the Philippines. I encourage you to read my sweet, little story about my time in the Motherland. The Philippines is a beautiful place filled with beautiful, hard-working, and resourceful people.  Many prayers and thoughts go out to those suffering through this tragedy.

xoxo-Nicole
---------------------------------------
One summer I had the opportunity to go to the Philippines with my family. Getting to physically be where my parents came from & see the places my grandparents lived and walked was an eye-opening experience. I felt connected and grounded and most of all humbled. Everywhere we went I saw joy and happiness exhibited in so many profound ways.

It actually blew my mind... because being in the Philippines challenged my joy & happiness.  At the time, I thought joy & happiness meant comfort. As an American, I want to be comfortable. I don't want to face challenges. I happen to like air conditioning.

Oh, so the shower has run out of hot water? Again??
So, we are going to be on a bus for 20 hours? Really people?!!!
And, there's no bathroom on this bus? Oh, so you want me to pee on the side of the road?!?!
Oh hell to the no!

At some point on this epic adventure, the lack of comfort got to me. There was a minor accident involving our bus, and I learned that the 20 hour bus ride will be much longer than anticipated. And, the turning point for me was that I had to pee on the side of the road while I am pretty sure my brother was on the bus trying to take my photo. The situation broke me. The experience made me cry and I hated my life. I wanted to know why the hell we were riding a bus without a bathroom for 20 plus effing hours.

When I got back on the bus, I swear people were smiling at me. I'm sure it was amusing for some of them to see a foreigner freak out about something so simple as public urination. Public urination is a normal everyday thing for them, and it's pretty laughable that I made a big scene about it.

No matter the resources or the situation Filipinos are resilient and resourceful. I'm not just talking about their ability to freely pee wherever they need to go pee. I'm talking about the way they live and approach life. Filipinos are some of the happiest people I know.

One evening in Manila, I was trying to sleep. I was in a room that was pretty humid and a mosquito kept buzzing around my head. Again, I was in a situation that was NOT COMFORTABLE. Then, I realized that I could hear music coming from the house next door. I could hear the family next door singing Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You" on karaoke. It was 2 am. It was hot. I was tired. And there are people out there laughing and enjoying their life. What kind of freakin' parallel universe am I in?

Then, I felt this burning pang of jealousy. It's not fair! I'm so unhappy and uncomfortable and sweaty. And, there are people right next to me who are so happy. Why? Why can't I be a Filipino and be happy too?

Then, BOOOOOM! I had the realization that I am a Filipino, too. Deep down inside me to the very core of my DNA, I am a Filipino. If my parents are from this parallel universe, then I am genetically wired to be a Filipino, too. At first I tried to convince myself that the genetic expression of that was impossible since I actually lived in America. But, I can't deny who I truly am. If I am a Filipino, then I have the same ninja-like power to be resilient, resourceful AND happy.

Despite any circumstance I am given, I have the option to choose joy and happiness because I was created by God to be this way.

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

As you say goodbye to summer, what are you thankful for?

A Trip to CHI-Town

Discovering the  magical wonders of The BEAN

Cardamon and Caramel Gelato

Playing with trucks

Jumping into creativity

Making my first pair of earrings

Biking adventures on the island

Running SeaWheeze and Being Outside

Traveling with YuShawnda

Yoga with a million people at Stanley Park
Goofing around
Reading lots of books

Adventures with my best friend

Thursday, March 28, 2013

February and March Highlights

February and March Highlights
It's been an adventurous ride into the early months of 2013. With my New Year's resolutions & dreams
on my mind, I've really delved into some interesting projects this year.

:: creativity - much needed time in my art journal, time at Mad Potter, and signed up for the Sketchbook project
:: yoga -hooray for the 40 days of yoga even practicing in French!
::running - completed a few more races the Chocolate 15K in Dallas, the Race Against Violence for HAWC,
and the Law Week 8K this past weekend, started venturing out on the trails, too!
:: stronger meditation and contemplative practices - this has been a bigger priority for me
especially during Lent::
::cooking - delicious meals with Jacob and with friends yum!
:: community & relationships - now that work has lessened up a bit, it's been nice
re-connecting with others at tea tastings, pottery paintings, yoga class and meals
:: and travel - we've taken a trip up to Dallas to visit JT's family and friends and I indulged in a long
weekend to Montreal and Quebec City::

My heart is full. Thankful for the opportunities to grow. And, I dream for an adventurous spring
for everyone. May you have the space to clear away what no longer serves you
and have the courage to take a big leap.
XOXO...


Creative community with a great group of ladies! Thanks Kate, Elizabeth, and Robin for
a fun way to get together, catch up, sip good wine and paint.

Carving out time with the boyfriend... Enjoying some delicious gelato after we
got reflexology massages on a lazy Sunday afternoon.

Thankful for my trip to Canada with a dear old friend. Taking a fun photo right before
we entered La Carnavale d'Hiver in beautiful Quebec City.

Canada's best warm weather staple, poutine! French fries drenched in
brown gravy and cheese curds.

Exploring and creating in Quebec City with a salvador dali lens on my camera. Very trippy, non?

There is something very contemplative about trains. Here I'm riding the train from
Montreal to Quebec City!

Enjoying the beautiful blanket of snow at the winter carnival.

Warmth and goodness in cup. J'adore le chocolat chaud.

Did a three day fruit cleanse for my 40 Days of Yoga challenge... And, I survived.

Had a lovely two day Valentine's adventure. The night before Valentine's I kidnapped JT and took
him to Podicheri. On Valentine's, we celebrated love with our joint love of St. Arnold's and
Dairy Maids cheese. (Our team won the poetry competition!)

In spite of some crazy hours with work, I have been able to cook and
hang out with friends at our weekly supper club. Good things happen when people come
together and enjoy a good meal.

Paid off my balance for my summer trip to Paris. I just need to pull the trigger and buy my airfare.
I can't wait to go to Paris. I'm so giddy.

Sometimes we just need to dress up and add a little shine to our day!

Enjoying the After Party with some really good friends. So many long days finally
came to an end this day. Thanks so everyone who came out to rock the night away.

Celebrated at the big hot mess party at Big Yoga!

Learned how strong, powerful and disciplined I truly could be. Thanks Big Yoga!

Monday, February 4, 2013

January 2013: New Year and New Chances

Enjoying morning contemplation with a cup of Earl Gray and snazzy socks

Celebrating 40 years of love, struggles, and joy. Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad

Stepped out of my comfort zone and watched a play with a good friend

Adventures in the park

Taking advantage of the mild weather and sunny skies.

My 2013 vision board


Full of ideas. Full of activity. And full of contemplation. It's been a pretty fast paced month - especially when it's a new year and you want to try new things.

-- The biggest challenge for me has been contemplation and shifting my thoughts. If contemplation and mindfulness is more valued than actions, why does the world pressure us to think differently. Each day, I wish to meditate, go to yoga, and pray. But, each day is also challenged to think quickly, speak faster and do more in shorter amounts of time. It can be overwhelming. But honestly, that is where I am. I am choosing to think more and to approach activities with more intention. I choose space over the crazy mindlessness....

-- Diving into taking care of my physical body. I am now tracking and working towards health. When you train for races and choose to practice yoga 6 times a week, your body shifts and your mind follows happily. I now wonder and think about the things I am eating, I can sleep better, And, I feel more energetic and happy.

-- Delving into relationships. I've been learning about relating to others, the different love languages, and the responsibility of taking care of myself in order to have enough courage and strength to love others in a courageous way. I have a feeling love and connectedness will be a constant theme in the coming months. There is so much to learn and I am allowing my foolishness and ignorance to humble me.

-- I honor my need for adventures, play, and creativity. I have enjoyed the Prado and War photography exhibits. I had the opportunity to see The Mountaintop. And, I am continuing to delve into reading more and journaling more. The morning pages have been very powerful lately.

-- I'm letting my need for spiritual connectedness lead me to view my life -- all the stressful, ugly, and beautiful parts -- as just one big lovely and courageous life.

-- I will continue to search for ways to serve. Where does my joy need to be? Where can I share and be generous and kind? What situations can I choose to let go of control and just exist in very plain and natural ways?

Cheers to an ambitious and dreamy start to 2013....